going off rail

so more and more of my friends are ponning sch or lessons. and i'll be honest, it fustrates me. why cant they suck it up and just go for the freaking lessons. its not like its wasting their time. its kinda like scheduled time-table. the time is for those lessons/sch. i told one of them that its wrong and he came up with a whole load of weird logic saying that it is wrong if you see it from the outer perspective but it is for the greater good and if you see it from the inner view, its right. pooh.

can you just imagine those ppl growing up and finding all sorts of ways to get extra time off their working time in the future? irresponsible. ok i sound like some goody-two-shoes and i dont know why but it does irritate me.

idk. rules are there so just freaking follow it. no point moving your way round it. or rather breaking it and try moving your way round the discipline mistress. i see no point in even trying to go off rail right now.

Connecting stones

havent written for so long. recently (and by recent i mean like within this hour) just had this picture of a stone in my head. ok, may be not a picture cause i cant really see any shape or anything. it was more of a feeling. the word "stone" came in my mind and i felt this incredible emotion. and hence, i decided to write about it. and i was thinking about what could make one have such feelings. i thought that maybe a tombstone of a loved one could make one feel like their heart has gone stone cold, or do the exact opposite of radiating warmth. im not sure if i did convey this cause im like a freaking amateur, but i tried my best and i hope its not too shabby. :)

Connecting Stones
Holding your little stone,
our names engraved with a sharp knife,
brought me back to our childhood life
at the edge of our pond, alone.

You taught me how to
make pebbles skip on water as you say
that you’ll swim like them one day
in an Olympic pool.

I cheered you on fanatically
as you trained hard against the clock
and brought home medals with a ring and a rock
and I nodded frantically.

A honeymoon in the ocean,
teasing, I pushed you down and down and down
until you could no longer make a sound
and ceased motion.

Now you lie underneath me
as I stare at the stone -half mine half yours-
tainted with wild grass but always pure,
it connects we.

Almighty You

Almighty You Have you imagined yourself to be all mighty, ominous and immortal?
Believing that you would use your powers for good and not evil,
you denounce that “There shall be Peace!” No crimes. You’d stop them
aabefore they know it.
No needs. No food. No water. No sleep. No work. Peace is boring.

And so declare that if peace exists not, “there shall be justice!”
You promise punishment for the bad and you held that promise
until one day you realized you were having too much joy
in the reeducation of your unlawful toys.

You snap out of frame and rose from your bed,
leaving all your riches and fame at the back of your head.
‘Power corrupts. Absolute power corrupts absolutely.’
You smile as you think you’ve found meaning.

You rushed for paper to pen down your epiphany
and in doing so, made yourself immortal with total control of your
aawriting.

lazy song~~

ok so i was guilted into writing this. -.- hope you are happy....

he expected me to bitch but not in dah mood. ah-ger-ness is feeling no bad today and is staying marvellous. :) my first lit P1 consultation tmr morning, provided mum/dad free in the morning to fetch me there.. *cross fingers*

me should sleep soon... should but probably wont cause still stuck here.

oh yar, and hopefully the Arnesh will come tmr too. he owes me a real drink.

aint a very long post today cause stomach got no fire/tears to write emo emo stuff. but stomach got acid. alot of acid. and acid is making agnes's bus rides suck ttm cause agnes feel like puking everytime.

but ahs. anyways. ahs. nth. bye :)

appreciate it

"[People] are absolutely careless about sending out [appreciation]. It is very foolish of [them]. Nothing annoys people so much as not receiving [appreciation]."
-a truncated quote from Oscar Wilde's The Importance of Being Earnest.

it is nice to be appreciated. so here i want to send my appreciation to those who took the time to appreciate me and make me feel special in my own way. :)

growing

familiar feelings make me feel just at home. i wont lie. i blushed and it brought me back to a place i knew at the back of my hand. felt good reminecing. but i know i wont turn back. today he made me know that i've grown.

You'll be fine

You'll be fine
“Don’t worry, you’ll be fine.
You’ve been doing so well so far.”
They were assuring and envious, may be,
As they quietly race to be on par.

“Relax little dearie, you’ll be fine.
You’ll get to where you want to be.”
He was calming and firm and certain,
But only if my goal I can see.

“Don’t stress my darling, you’ll be fine.
You’re sure to work to your aim.”
They were supportive and comforting, always,
Yet may not fully comprehend my pain.

I know I’d be fine. I’ll definitely get there.
I’ll be on my heels, I’ll run.
I’ll take all your advice- goal, plan, work!
It is easier said than done.

certificates

i have stomach fluuuuuuuuuuuuuuu! and my result slip.

One of them showed:
Biology- B- 83 percentile
Chemistry- S- 21 percentile
General Paper- D- 69 percentile
Literature in English- D- 47 percentile
Mathematics- A- 87 percentile

The other showed:
Lacteol Forte Sachet- 1 sac 2 times a day- for diarrhorea
Dhalumag mixture- take 10mls 3 times a day- for gastric discomfort
Domperidone tablet- take 1 tab 3 times aday- for abdominal distension
Anarex tablet- take 2 tabs 3 times a day- for pain, fever and relax muscle
MC- to certify that Lee Jia Ling is unfit for school for 1 day

MCMCMCMCMC

sick with a fever. sore throat. grrrr... cant feel my limbs, but am feeling every once of pain in my back and neck. hope to get an MC for tmr so that i can mug for chem and bio tests. besides, then i wont have to rush through my GP clinic work. :)

for the sake of my As for my As

ok so these are some incidents that happened today. am writing it here, well, cause this is my blog. and you probably already know it cause the URL has the word blogspot on it. so im kind of stating the obvious here. and if you are so much a smart alec that has like lit genes or something, you'd probably hear from my tone that im not in such a good mood now.

so today at GP lesson, i got back my essay. it is 25/50. i expected better. well, more of i wanted better. i couldn't really expect much cause i wasnt really into writing the essay unlike other times. my cher gave some harsh comments. not a big fan. he questioned my hardworking-ness. he claimes i did not do any research at all. well, DUH! i remembered specifically that he said the assignment during the holidays need not be toooo serious. oh wells, i did do research in the end. so much for putting in effort. tmr there is another timed-prac essay. have to go do research later. -.-

in Bio class, somehow, a political subject was raised. there was a heated argument, between her and... well, only she was talking and talking and talking... shut up bitch. ok, i get the whole harmony-happy-friends thing but im tired of hypocritism. im no longer going to pretend to be nice to her anymore. i am just going to be a downright bitch. actually, shes not really that bad. she just annoys me. i have a low EQ. too bad for her.

there is too much saga happening in my life and i know i cant stop them. i spoke to nan today, suggesting to her about my ultimate plan of being solitary for the sake of my As for my As. ok, unless you are a sad singaporean teenager, you probably do nto understand what i meant. i mean to get A grades for my Alevel examinations in November. then again, im not sure if my plan will work. im not sure, even, if I would work.

due to all these drama amongst me, i believe i'd tried to relieve some of my feelings to some friends. i feel i got closer to some. some i feel weird telling them cause of indifference and some.... well, one of them. its such a weird feeling. its like how he seems to know so much of me. and he makes comparisons and speculates. so supposedly, i should feel close to him. yet, i dont.
maybe it is because of weird feelings in the past. but i think it is mostly that he doesn't open up to me. i know he has been telling lies. i mean, even if you do not want to tell me about something, there is no need to lie.

whatever. i need to start thinking A levels instead of everything else. i just wanna apologise to anyone who has seen this and felt pissed or guilty. ok, im being hypocritical again cause eitherway, i dont really care. back to GP research now...