Topic: Weakness (day 26)
I guess I don't really have the right to be mad at you. So I should be sorry I lashed out. You were only trying to help in a way you know how. I guess I just was not open to tough love. I needed someone to tell me I was going to be okay. And that feeling like this was normal. Not many people I know go through what I am doing to myself mentally. I know at least you have and I guess I was trying to clasp on to some sort of comfort in that. But you did not gift what I hoped to receive and I cannot fault you for my own expectations despite my plummeting emotions. You went for practicality and reason. But I already have that and needed assurance. Reasoning what I already know makes me feel more useless for not doing something about it. The way you treated me was how I treat myself and, now that I think about it, how you probably treat yourself. It's a shame that I cannot accept my own cruelty.
Signing off, Useless
Weaknesses
So much power yet
if you think it hard enough
so little control.
